just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
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