Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Randomize
