I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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