I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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