do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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