best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Randomize
