Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
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