its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
