She's JV to your varsity
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I have aggressive nipples.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
