you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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