Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
