i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I stole a fireplace last night.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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