I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Randomize
