Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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