on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
