she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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