remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize
