ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
soo... how was my night?
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
