i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
