the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Randomize