she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize