found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
