what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
