Where are you?
In a non slutty way
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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