If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
