I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
jump out the window naked night went bad
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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