I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
