3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
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