That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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