Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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