She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Randomize
