So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Randomize
