please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Quick, to the slutcave!
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
