I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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