Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Randomize
