I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
