Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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