Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
She told me I should be a condom model.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
