he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
it was like eating out sand paper
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
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