I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
