i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
When are your genitals available?
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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