I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
