I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Randomize
