No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I wanna passion pit in your ass
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
