is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
There r osticjed everywhere
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
