Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
