I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Randomize
