i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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