I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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