You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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