I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
