I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
